Refined Tastes

6.30am My phone buzzes, ripping me from sleep. It’s a text message from Annie, that simply reads “being awake is so not legit.” It’s a Sunday. It’s 6.30am. Normally my Sunday routine is to rise around 11am, making whimpering noises until I have a cup of coffee. I then spend the next half hour slumped…

I Am a Very Selfless Person

Back in the 1980s, when I was a baby, my mother saved my life. As I was the firstborn, she was new to motherhood, still doing everything properly. I would have been swathed in clean, hand-knitted blankets, free of vomit stains. I don’t have children, but from what I can work out, if you have…