Haiku Reviews of Public Bathrooms: Fringe Bar

Welcome to a series in which I review public bathrooms in haiku form.

Previous editions: Fork & Brewer |  Courtenay Place public toilets

A bard having a blast in the bathroom.

Fringe Bar, Wellington

Door signs in Māori
It’s a nice cultural touch
In a Kiwi bar.

When you get inside
The wall of chlorine hits you
Like a public pool.

Space is limited
Be prepared to get cosy
With fellow queue-ers.

Stand awkwardly close
In front of a huge mirror
There’s nowhere to look.

To make it less weird
Stare straight ahead at yourself
Keep eye contact locked.

You notice new things
(Nostrils asymmetrical)
(Knees like my grandma.)

This newfound knowledge
Is not welcome or wanted
You avert your eyes.

Then they come to rest
On the item located
Upon the sink top.

Bowl of free condoms?
Take back all that I have said
Best bathrooms ever.